Sunday, 26 October 2008

Just How Indestructible IS Captain Scarlet?

The works of Gerry Anderson were some classic stuff, that's nothing that can be argued. He did things from puppet shows to puppet shows to tv shows about actors who LOOKED like puppets (such as UFO)

When asked, everyone mentions Thunderbirds as his pinnacle. That's utter rubbish however - Captain Scarlet takes that honour.

Captain Scarlet worked for Spectrum, an organisation which fought the dreaded Mysterons from Mars. High drama indeed. These evil Mysterons could, with their sCarY glowing circles, duplicate any person, and wage war... against fashion designers and other such targets. Heading up the fight was one man fate had made indestructible... Captain Scarlet!

Yes, Captain Scarlet, the main character, was indestructible. Some may say that having a tv program where every week the villains try to kill a man who can't be killed was a bit anticlimactic. I would say for them to shut the hell up, because it had a rocking theme tune. And yes, the technical definition /was/ rocking

Why am I talking about Captain Scarlet though, cool as it is! As most people know, I have a rather large collection of Transformers. My dad, by contrast, has a rather small collection of Captain Scarlet figures and vehicles (I win, I win). So one day, I 'liberated' his Captain Scarlet figure to ask the question which is on everyone's (mine) lips:

Just how indestructible IS Captain Scarlet?

1 - Cutting
This little plan was cancelled close to being carried out after I realised that Scarlet was my dads, and that my dad was both bigger and stronger than me. So I respectfully didn't cut Captain Scarlet in half. But I'm sure that being indestructible, he would have easily survived

2 - Radiation
Long-term readers of my site might note that since I've returned from University for the holidays, my family have purchased a new microwave. Fools. Can the good captain survive a healthy dose of lethal radiation?

Meh. He still lives. Or is as alive as a man made entirely from plastic can be. Note: PLEASE do not microwave toys in the microwave. No, really

3 - Hanging
Like any criminal (damn government agent) what would happen if I tried to hang Scarlet? The noose tightened round his neck (in a photograph so well taken... its arty, dammit) but his neck did not snap, nor did his legs hang limp. Incredible!

4 - The Beast
During construction of the noose, my cat Mr Chocky (he hears voices in his head, like the John Wyndham novel 'Chocky') started getting very excited about the string, ruffle his fur the scamp. So what would he think of of a Captain Scarlet chew toy? Heh heh heh... Instant mauling!

Unfortunately he didn't seem that interested in the good captain. Silly cat

5 - Dodgyness
Ehehehe. Yes, you knew this was coming, didn't you? It's tradition, dammit. But still, Scarlet lives. Will nothing kill him?

 6 - Death By Hamster
Frustrated, I threw Scarlet into my hamsters cage. Like a hero, he leapt onto the bars and evaded the gaping maw of the monster beneath him. More thrilling than any movie!

7 - The Final Assault
Would anything defeat Scarlet? There was only one chance, one dreaded weapon, banned by several UN conventions, the very possession of which would cause a US/UK military force to storm my house in order to destroy it. So I gave it to Scarlet...

Poor, poor man. Obviously the genius of Woolf's REALLY REALLY GOOD HONEST feminist work was just too much for him. And hereon ends the story of Captain Scarlet...


  1. Oh wow, I had that toy.

  2. A cute ''storyboard''page for our hero!I've never had these toy's as a little girl,growing up.But,I've heard of them threw ''Fanderson'',back in England for year's.Talk about figurine's.....if you want to get some 'plastic statue's''of ''Captain Scarlet'',they sell them threw ''Fanderson''.But,they are pricey,in Pound's sterling.The cost is....L5995.99.So,you would need to save a lot of money for those plastic,puppet replica's.If that were me,though,I would go for the much cheaper thing's,like book's.Those are $3.99 or $5.99.You've got to account for inflation being much higher in Europe, than the United State's.Best wishe's to collecting!I can understand why some of this stuff would be collectable,though!From;bets